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Review posted January 5, 2019 by Slasher Index

Swingers Massacre

NONE - Even Steven Productions | 1987 | VHS | Slipcase
Summary
"He wanted to swing. She didn’t. She learned to swing, he couldn’t. When party time came for Amy and Charlie, their friends turned into fiends. This unsuspecting couple was caught up in a vortex of sex, murder and mayhem from which there was no escape. Beware of those who’ll love you to death!"
Body

Welcome to the world of false advertising and blatant lies! Swingers Massacre is no massacre at all, but rather a drama that happens to have a few murders. The cover is enticing: A terrified blonde with a big burly fist around her neck, a knife near her head and the word "massacre" spelled out in blood. Sounds like my kind of movie, right? WRONG. There is no blood in this movie (that I remember). No one is stabbed, sliced, diced, nothing that would indicate this was in fact a body count movie.

 

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Directed by prolific TV cinematographer Ronald Victor Garcia, the movie is actually a drama from 1974 called Inside Amy. In later years, the film was retitled to Super Swinging Playmates to sound like a fun sexploitation romp, until the late 80s when it was retitled yet again, this time by Even Steven Productions to fit the horror genre. If I'm to pull any meaning from this movie, I guess you could say its a morality tale about the dark side of swinging. When a husband convinces his reluctant wife to join the swinging scene, roles reverse, where she's the one getting all the suitors whereas he can't get it up. Frustrated and overwhelmed by jealousy, he kills a few of his wife's partners with the most boring methods possible: car fumes and poison. Lame (#nothorror). The only other thing I remember from this movie is that someone orders a pizza and I think the delivery guy gets some action. I must admit though, while watching this film, the last 15 or so minutes were missing from the cassette. In other words, the entire movie didn't fit and Even Steven Productions basically said, "f#ck it, leave it" (probably). I'm pretty confident that there wasn't any big blow out gore fest at the end, so I'm not too concerned that I missed something.

 

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Collectors who buy this movie do so for the title, cover art and distributor. Its a great example to what lengths a distributor will go to sell a movie, even if it goes beyond embellishing and becomes flat out marketing fraud. Even Steven Productions did the same basic thing with their release of Midnight Intruders, another film I reviewed which is worth checking out (the review, not the movie, God no). From what I understand, the owner of Even Steven Productions was the son of one of the producers of Inside Amy (I guess dad approved of the new title and blatant lie?). Below is an early YouTube review I did back in the day. Pardon the subpar production values. Its a product of its time ;)

 

 

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